Cable outage

I’ve had to listen to Those Two rant many a time about their cable company. This usually occurs when a bill arrives, followed by Mama C on the phone for long periods trying to negotiate a new “bundle,” whatever that is, or when Mama G comes home from a long night at work, just wanting to relax with a little mindless TV, only to find that the only thing showing is “No signal.”

Well I can relate to their frustration, because I’ve been without my own version of cable TV for a long time now, and I’m getting pretty fed up with the delay. I used to spend hours sitting at my favorite window, watching such shows as For the Birds or Squirrel Standoff, in which a squirrel and I would go practically eyeball-to-eyeball, me with my jaw chattering, he or she with his or her tail twitching. Usually I would win the final round of this game show, with the squirrel eventually turning tail and running.

My TV was basically just a big tree branch stuck into the ground, with suet or other bird food attached to the top. We’re not talking high-tech here, so when it blew over in a storm, I was expecting service to resume pretty quickly. But months later, I’m still waiting for the cable guy, or should I say cable gals?

What is this, some kind of twisted, six-month service window? C’mon, a guy can only wait so long for his favorite shows. This is just plain nuts! I’m guessing the squirrel would agree.