Oxbow's World

Sorry I haven’t been posting much lately, but I’ve been busy self-quarantining. Actually, I’ve been self-quarantining for years, out of an abundance of caution. So you might think life hasn’t changed much at all for me since the coronavirus pandemic hijacked our lives, but you’d be surprised.

For one thing, I’m a pretty sensitive guy, and I can sense my mamas’ anxiety about it all. My daily routine is all different now, too. Mama G is spending much more time at home, channeling her feelings of helplessness into painting projects. If the coronavirus doesn’t kill us first, the paint fumes just might! Mysterious early-morning shopping trips have ended with Those Two high-fiving each other over a four-pack of toilet paper, and me being served food I don’t really like. Mama C just canceled a trip to Florida, and is now home 24/7 as well. I love my mamas dearly, but let’s just say that “family time” can be overrated.

So I have just been hanging out, wondering what the future will bring. There’s only so much catnip a guy can consume each day to avoid reality.

Of course no one knows how, or when, the pandemic will end. And maybe things will never be “normal” as we knew them before, but they will surely get better.

Stay healthy out there!

After a while a guy sees and hears plenty of things, and learns even more. Some of my more recent educational moments include learning the phrase “Happy Hour,” and also how to use my looks and charm to work the system.

We’ll start with Happy Hour. Perhaps Those Two wouldn’t like me sharing this, but they often like to have an evening nip at the bar in our house. Somewhere along the way, they started luring me downstairs with promises of some nip of my own, and before I knew it, I had become a regular! They even shout out my name when I enter the room!

Pretty soon I learned that if I just sat quietly at their feet and looked cute enough, they would also give me some cat treats. Here’s my begging face.

See what I mean? Right, who could resist that?!!

Anyway, Those Two have realized they’ve created a bit of a monster, because now when they go downstairs for any reason, at any time, I think it’s Happy Hour! Mama G wasn’t too happy about that when she recently had to share a barstool with me as she drank her morning coffee.

A couple of nights ago, I even wowed them with my amazing leaping ability by jumping directly onto the bar, right between their still-full shot glasses!

Security! I guess some cats just can’t handle their catnip and treats.

Just thought I’d blow a kiss your way and send warm thoughts on this chilly day.

I hope Those Two bring me home a nice bouquet of cat grass!

Sorry I’ve been missing in action for a while again. I had a tough week, and have been keeping a low profile. You see, it was time for my annual visit to the doctor last week. To make matters even more nerve-racking, I had to see yet another new doctor, because the one I saw last year had left the practice. I hope it wasn’t anything I said or did!

Anyway, the day started off peacefully enough, until I found myself suddenly scooped up from my resting place and stuffed into my carrier. That’s never a good sign!

Fortunately it’s only a short drive to the doctor’s office. As usual, I was number one on the patient board at the entrance! Or maybe I was tied with Gracie. It’s kind of like the Iowa caucus: it’s hard to tell what happened.

We were immediately ushered into the exam room, where the veterinary assistant, Carrie, got some information from us and took a look at me. She was very sweet and gentle, and I think she liked me, as most of the ladies do!

Then Dr. Gary Gluck came in. He was very nice, too, but I was a little concerned when he spun me around and said it was time to examine my “pee-er and pooper.” I don’t know about you, but doctors who don’t use proper anatomical terms make me a little nervous! Those Two just giggled. It was right about that time that I embarrassed myself. I’ll spare you the details. Let’s just say the staff was probably happy to see me leave!

The dental part of the exam didn’t go too well either. Looks like I’ll need to have the last of my remaining teeth — all three of them — removed. I’m not happy about the idea of more surgery, but I know I’ll be in good hands.

Going to the doctor every year is a pain, but good health is everything.

If you’re waiting for me to add “that is the question,” don’t hold your breath, because of course it’s a no-brainer! There is no place bedder to be than in bed! (I hope the pun gods forgive me for that one.)

And that has never been truer than it is now, thanks to Those Two finally forking out some cash to step up their sleep game. They used to marvel at how much better they slept in hotels, so last year they sprung for a hotel-quality mattress. It was a good start, but something was still missing. And that, of course, was the bedding itself. So they recently decided to get with the program and purchased a down comforter and duvet cover. And what a difference it has made!

I no longer have to knead and knead to create just the right spot for my soft body in that scratchy, cheap comforter they used to have. Now I just plop myself down wherever and voilà! — I am one with the bed! Sometimes they can’t even find me in there!

Now, every day and night is a holiday at the old inn here, and I have never felt more rested. Which is a pretty difficult achievement, because I am almost always well-rested!

Well, that’s it for today. If you have any questions or comments, you know where to find me.

So how are you all making out with your New Year’s resolutions? You know, the ones in which you vowed to eat better and hit the gym more frequently?

I’m just sitting on my resolution to do the same.

I figure there’s no hurry, seeing as how I’m a cat and supposedly have nine lives to get it right. Besides, no one wants to see my orange tail in Spandex!

As we all get ready to bid farewell to 2019 and welcome 2020, I just wanted to urge my human friends to be especially careful tonight! We all know it’s a dangerous world out there, and even more so on New Year’s Eve, what with all the alcohol consumption and other stupid human tricks. Holidays in general are fraught with danger. Just ask Mama C. She decided last week to get a head start on the festivities and took a good chunk out of her left thumb while attempting to make an apple pie on Christmas Eve!

She was using an apple corer, and it was proving a bit stubborn at performing its intended task. So she decided to coax it with a good right fist, hammer-style, forgetting that her left hand was somewhere underneath. Mama G, who was in another room at the time, was a bit startled when she heard Mama C cry out from the kitchen. “What’s wrong?” she hollered. Mama C responded with yet another painful, wordless cry. Mama G, who has a let’s-just-get-to-the-point style about her, rolled her eyes and headed out to the kitchen, figuring Mama C was overreacting to some minor mishap. She wasn’t prepared for the blood. She’s not usually good with the sight of blood, but she calmly fetched a first-aid kit and wrapped Mama C’s thumb.

They decided to sit on the situation for a bit. Well, actually Mama C was lying on the floor at one point, begging for some toast, because she thought she was going to pass out. Mama G obliged, and fed her the toast while she was stretched out on the floor. It’s a good thing she didn’t choke!

Mama C eventually went to the sofa to lie down. After about a half-hour, Those Two decided to take a peek under the gauze and see what was happening. Much to Mama G’s surprise, Mama C’s thumb promptly began dripping blood like a leaky faucet. Mama G went and changed her clothes and was ready to take Mama C to the hospital, but Mama C declined medical treatment, as the professionals like to say.

Well, I could document this story with gory photos, but I’ll spare you. That Mama G is something — no matter what the crisis, she’s never been one to pass up a photo op or a YouTube moment!  I’ll share just this one photo with you, of me watching over Mama C after the second bandaging attempt. I was pretty darn worried about her!

So was Mama G, but she now had to temporarily focus on other things: it was up to her to bake the pie that everyone was expecting the next day. She got rid of the “accident apple,” as she took to calling it, tossed that evil corer in the trash can, and went to work, making a very nice pie as Mama C recuperated under my watchful eye. Eventually the bleeding stopped.

Mama C decided to have her thumb looked at by a doctor several days later, because she was worried about infection, but all was good. It’ll take a while for it to heal, but she’s on the mend.

It was one of those “we’ll laugh about this someday” moments. In fact, Those Two already are, making jokes to the effect that Mama C is “all thumbs” when it comes to baking pies. For tonight’s festivities, they decided to play it safe and got takeout Thai food, and plan to spend the evening at home watching movies.

So be careful out there, and happy new year!

 

So I’ve been around long enough to know that humans do crazy things on the so-called holidays (I put it that way because they sure do have a way of making just about every day a holiday).

So it didn’t surprise me to learn that Mama G, after a couple of glasses of pinot noir, was fraternizing on Christmas with that other species, whose name I refuse to speak.

Normally I would be a bit mad at Mama G, but instead I found myself a little disgusted with that other creature. Her name is Liberty, and yes, she’s awfully cute, but does she not have any dignity? Really, you just throw yourself on the floor and expect people to rub your belly?

Well, granted, it worked for Mama G, but she’s a sucker for anything with four legs, or wings, or even gills. I’d just like to say to Liberty: Have some self-respect, girl! I would love to teach you a lesson or two about working the humans so that they practically throw themselves on the floor. It’s all about the attitude! You’re begging them, but you have to make it so they beg you!

But I’ll cut you a break, Liberty. You’re a dog. Oops, I spoke the name. At least you didn’t ruin Christmas, like this dog did.

I just wanted to shout it out from the treetops:

Merry Christmas!!!

No, that’s not a typo, though I do often fat-paw the keys when posting. First, you’ve probably been wondering where I’ve been. Well, need I remind you that it’s the holiday season? I’ve noticed that humans become very stressed out at this time of year! It might surprise you to know that I’ve been busy with holiday chores, too. First, I decided to decorate my cat tree this year:

I know it’s not a very elaborate display, but rigging up lights is hard work, especially when you don’t possess opposable thumbs.

I’ve also been spending a lot of time guarding the gifts that Mama C has assembled for her family. You see, Mama C sometimes frets about things, so I wanted to reassure her that her Christmas purchases will be safe under my watch.

Oops, you caught me while on a little break.

Anyway, back to that headline. A couple of days ago Mama C went to stroke my head and she noticed that there was a sticky substance on my right ear. She bent closer to investigate with her nose and got a good whiff of pine! Ha, and to think Those Two were under the impression that I never bother the Christmas tree! Then last night they caught me drinking out of the tree stand. Hey, I was just trying to join them during Happy Hour. Because nothing makes me happier than being with my family.